One of the last times I was with both of my parents. You can see Mom and I are peas in a pod. The opal necklace she’s wearing I gave her for her 60th birthday and she never took it off. Now I have it and can’t believe I’m almost to 60 myself.
We Were Tired of Eating at Home
Written by Margie Bunge
Illustrated by Laurie Bunge (Weaver)
Voiced by Laurie Weaver
A special story written with my Mom when I was a kid.
My mom passed away recently. It was unexpected. Painful. Now rudderless, I was lost – a ghost orphan, my identity as a daughter stripped away. Then going through her things, I found a book we had written together when I was around 10. I’d forgotten it. But reading our creative work brought back the good times and reminded me just how lucky I was to have a mom like her. I decided to read the story aloud and show you the illustrations of my ten-year-old self as a tribute to my mom, Margie Bunge.
It’s been a long time. I sure miss you. I’m glad you have moved on to new and exciting adventures.
To some degree I am moving forward also. I still can’t get my COE under control, however through therapy I understand what is going on. I feel the shame and guilt going away and I’m beginning to feel like I deserve to be healthy, I am worthy of being healthy.
You will always be an important part of my recovery.
I’m sorry I didn’t make more of an effort to see you when you came up for your mother. So sorry for your loss, remember your feelings of lost, grief and separation are real, you deserve to feel them and process them and take as long as you need. The way you are feeling is valid and healthy. Don’t bury them with food, let them out.
FYI I have started my own blog too.
Thanks Dave, please don’t worry about not reaching out, when I was home I was crazy busy with family and hospital and arrangements. I still feel like I don’t quite have room to breathe even now. I’m stoked to hear about your progress and new blog! I’m looking forward to reading what’s in your heart. I’m glad you are understanding more and more that you are worth all of the good things. Surprisingly, I haven’t overeaten through all of this grief. I still weigh within 1-2 pounds of when I stopped the regular show. Now that weight is higher than I’d hoped, but I’m at peace that my body is my body and not my enemy. One of the last things Mom said to me was that I was beautiful, and I told her, it was true…since I look just like her. Keep me posted on your progress, ’cause I still, really, really, REALLY, care. xoxoxoxox
So awesome! That’s all.
I’m happy to see you here lauri. I don’t even want to try to begin to understand what you might be experiencing, or have gone thru.
My mother has fallen ill. It’s been tough.
So glad your taking care of yourself and loving yourself. That’s important.
Oh Dawny, I’m so sorry to hear about your mom. Big hugs for you and your family. It is a stressful time, I know. For me, I’m still adjusting and in shock. I’m trying to build my life again in my new circumstance. I was so lucky I just decided to fly up and visit Mom and so had one day with her where she was getting better and we could share our love and stories , before her complication happened. Being there is a blessing. Hang in there my friend, I am very much sending love your way. Xoxoxoxo
Laurie, I’m so sorry to hear about your mom. It does seem to leave us feeling rudderless when we lose our parents, doesn’t it? I hope you’re doing ok. Your book was beautiful, and what a treasure to remember her by. I owe you a long email. Need to catch up. Please take care of yourself, girlfriend. Be in touch soon.
Love & Hugs,
Cheryl
Hey Gal, thanks for stopping by. I’m glad you liked the story. Funny how I’d forgotten it until I found it. So much of our lives are these small moments that slip away. From time to time I listen to old COD shows when I walk, and I am amazed at how much of those events I had forgotten too. I hope things are going well with you and your family. I have been doing pretty well in the last year. Very focused on my voice acting and am part of the LA voice acting community. I’m working right now (or was) with a well known voice actor to professionally produce my first commercial demo (what you send to agents to get representation), and I’ve increased my activity in real life 10 times over. My weight remains stable with no dieting. But this loss, as you know yourself, my friend, has wacked the legs from me. I struggle to do the smallest task, and the big things are overwhelming. Both of my cats are still here and being cuddly, and it was such a blessing that my brother and his wife provided a home to my mom’s cat. Mark and I had bought an air ticket to bring him home with us, but it would have been very hard on all of the cats, since my mom’s cat had been an only cat, has 3 legs, and we have a 2-story house. Mom’s cat is thriving in my brother’s 1-story house with access to a fenced backyard that he cannot jump. Emotionally I’m numb. Hard to focus. Hard to make the bed. Hard to do anything but veg. So I’m trying to gently get myself moving. Walking a little, even in the halls of home, working on voice, even if just practicing tongue twisters. The story I posted I had to let go of self-critique, because it wasn’t a voice actor’s read, but a daughter’s read. I’ve never felt anything like this new found reality as an adult orphan. My dad was very hard, but this is 1000 times harder. Plus side, I did reconnect with many family members during this time, and it is up to me to help keep the connections going. Again, hard for me, but worth the effort. Even when friends like you post or message, it helps me know I’m not really alone. It’s just an illusion of my grief. xoxoxoxoxox
Sending you an email… 🙂
Laurie! This was amazing. I’m so sorry about your mom. I can’t imagine. I hope things are getting easier… But I know it’s got to be tough. Thanks for being vulnerable enough to share your life with us! I’ve been praying for you!
Thank you so much for taking the time to stop by to let me know of your prayers and encouragement. It means a whole lot. This is a difficult time, especially with the holiday season, but I am doing well. Little by little, I’m getting back to my life and integrating these new emotions and memories. The lessons are very deep and my comfort is that I trust they will help me in the end honor my mom by being someone she would be proud of. xoxoxoxoxoxo
<3 <3 <3 this so much – what a lovely memory and keepsake x
Thank you Jo, that means a lot. xoxoxox